I woke up this morning to my two beautiful little girls, ages 1.5 and 6. As much as I love them, and as cute as they are, I did not want to be a stay at home mom today. In fact, if we are being honest, I haven't really ever wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. Most days I feel as though my sense of identity or "me-ness" is slipping away like the tide. I wonder if I could still compete in a world with no children; if there is still a "me" outside this home. And then there is the ever-lurking sense of failure at the actual job of motherhood...am I doing well raising these children, or will I screw them up for life?
And this morning, I realized it all boiled down to one question.... Am I enough?
Am I enough in who I am to be valued?
Am I enough to raise decent children?
Am I enough to keep this house at a general state of cleanliness?
Am I enough to keep my husband happy and loved?
Am I enough if I am "just" a mother and wife?
Am I enough?
And then I realized the answer as plain as the nose on my face: No. I am not enough. I cannot be the perfect parent. I cannot be the perfect wife. I cannot be enough to fulfill all the needs that arise around me.
But God is. HE is enough.
And the weight lifted off of my shoulders. I do not have to be enough to answer those questions,
I only have to be enough at what He has already created me enough for.
I AM enough to reflect a loving God.
I AM enough to allow His love to love my children and my spouse through me.
I AM enough to be the mother of these children that HE wants me to be or He wouldn't have given them to me. The same goes for being a wife.
I AM enough if I am "just" a wife and a mother especially since it is what HE has called me to.
I AM enough to praise Him.
I AM enough to be HIS child, and one whom He loves in all her imperfections.
Only in HIS STRENGH, HIS POWER, and HIS LOVE - I am enough.
So when you are having a rough day, and you are worried about your worth and ability to fulfill your purpose remember, as I am telling myself today...
You do not have to be and are not enough.
BUT HE IS.
Being continually molded,
Sarah
And this morning, I realized it all boiled down to one question.... Am I enough?
Am I enough in who I am to be valued?
Am I enough to raise decent children?
Am I enough to keep this house at a general state of cleanliness?
Am I enough to keep my husband happy and loved?
Am I enough if I am "just" a mother and wife?
Am I enough?
And then I realized the answer as plain as the nose on my face: No. I am not enough. I cannot be the perfect parent. I cannot be the perfect wife. I cannot be enough to fulfill all the needs that arise around me.
But God is. HE is enough.
And the weight lifted off of my shoulders. I do not have to be enough to answer those questions,
I only have to be enough at what He has already created me enough for.
I AM enough to reflect a loving God.
I AM enough to allow His love to love my children and my spouse through me.
I AM enough to be the mother of these children that HE wants me to be or He wouldn't have given them to me. The same goes for being a wife.
I AM enough if I am "just" a wife and a mother especially since it is what HE has called me to.
I AM enough to praise Him.
I AM enough to be HIS child, and one whom He loves in all her imperfections.
Only in HIS STRENGH, HIS POWER, and HIS LOVE - I am enough.
So when you are having a rough day, and you are worried about your worth and ability to fulfill your purpose remember, as I am telling myself today...
You do not have to be and are not enough.
BUT HE IS.
Being continually molded,
Sarah
